Last week during the 10am and 6pm services I asked a very controversial question; ‘should Christians grant someone forgiveness if they don’t repent?’. The answer to that question is hotly debated among Christians. The reason I claim the answer to be ‘no’ is to protect against (i) injustice and (ii) bitterness.
You see to simply forgive someone without them repenting is to say their sinful actions don’t really matter. This makes a mockery of justice; which is why God NEVER forgives people unless they first repent. Surely God would not demand from his subjects something he is unwilling to do himself; i.e. forgiveness without repentance.
This does make life a little harder for Christians though, because when someone wrongs us, we cannot simply forgive them in our heart, without discussing the matter with them. As Matthew 18:15-17 commands, Christians are to confront those who sin against us, and encourage them to repent.
However, what if someone is unwilling to repent, or perhaps unable to, because they have since died? Does that mean the Christian is destined to harbour bitterness in their heart for life, because granting forgiveness is now impossible (i.e. without repentance)? Well this is where a very subtle but important nuance comes is. Christians are to OFFER forgiveness in such circumstances. This means telling the person ‘I am willing to forgive you when you ask for it’. Since forgiveness is a gift, it can only be effective if it is received. Receiving forgiveness happens through repentance.
It may seem like pointless semantics to argue the difference between ‘offering’ and ‘giving’ forgiveness. But as mentioned, these important terms protect against injustice on the one hand (i.e. declaring their sin doesn’t matter), and bitterness on the other (being unable to let go of resentment through an inability to forgive). It is only through these important semantics that God’s on forgiveness is upheld.
