Today’s sermon is looking at how to be a strong person; not the kind that can lift heavy weights, but the kind that is not crushed by life’s ‘storms’ (difficulties). We all want to be strong; but how do we foster strength in our children? If parents are doing their job in preparing their children for adulthood, this will include training them in how to handle difficulties when they come. But how?
The first step is to NOT shelter them from adversity. While loving parents find it difficult not to swoop in and rescue their child from suffering, parents need to understand this can often be more about loving ourselves as parents (i.e. avoiding the personal heartache of seeing our progeny suffer), than about loving our children. Yes, it is difficult watching our children suffer. But shielding our children from all hardship leaves them unprepared for adulthood.
Stepping in to fight our children’s battles for them has a similar outcome. If children are not properly prepared to face adversity, they will be running home to mummy well into their 20s and 30s.
The way to foster strength in children is to walk through the adversity with them. This will require open communication of course, which is best fostered in their younger years. If your teenager has closed communication lines though, which is all too common, sometimes all parents can do is pray, and continually remind them we’re there for them.
We then sit down with the child and talk through the issue. This first requires listening, then showing sympathy. Before we start to ‘fix’ them, they need to know you love them enough to listen and to understand. Then ask what they think is the best path to follow, giving subtle or overt guidance as needed. Finally, release them to face that challenge THEMSELVES. Doing so will build their self-confidence and help them to deal with challenges alone as they enter adulthood.
